Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
In general, I have a high tolerance for the scary stuff. Slimy monsters? Awesome. Ghost stories? Bring 'em on. Slasher movies? I don't particularly like them, but if I'm bored, I might watch the ending to see if there's a clever twist a la Mrs. Voorhees. But for some reason, I have no tolerance for zombies. There's a line in NICE GIRLS DON'T HAVE FANGS about Jane crying during the preview for Dawn of the Dead? Well, that was autobiographical. Heck, Shaun of the Dead gave me nightmares and it's supposed to be a comedy!
Why, you might ask, does someone who so obviously fears animated dead people choose to write about vampires? While most pre-Dracula vampires were considered mindless, decaying ghouls, modern incarnations have personality. They can be reasoned with. In general, they want something besides blood, whether it be redemption, a cure for their condition or the love of a modern woman who just happens to look like the busty Bavarian chick he used to be married to centuries ago. And there are a whole lot of ways to kill vampires. Zombies keep on ticking even if you dip them in holy water, drag them into the sunlight, set them on fire or stab them in the chest with a handy wooden object.
Zombies combine two things that push my primal fear buttons, an indiscriminate, infectious killing force and the breakdown of "the system." In every zombie movie you see, the ragtag band of survivors skulks through a landscape of burning buildings, over-turned cars and the mangled bodies of authorities sent to fight the zombies. You cannot hide. You cannot find a safe place. You cannot trust anyone because they are one hidden zombie bite from crossing over and devouring your brain. And personally, I dig the system. The system provides police protection, medical care, heat, light and the safe delivery of Ben and Jerry's to my local Wal-Mart. I don't want to see the system shut down.
Zombie movies tap into our fear, not of disaster, but of surviving disaster; of making choices to ensure the safety of loved ones; of relying on our own skills and planning to survive. Trust me, I don't handle a firearm well enough to shoot my way out of a zombie-infested abandoned military base where I just happened to attend a rave, so I would probably be one of the first fringe characters to get eaten.
And yet, I feel compelled to watch zombie movies- even if they're the watered down TV-edited versions. Land of the Dead- is there anything more terrifying than a zombified John Leguizamo? House of the Dead 2, which scared me far more because it was set on a college campus, for some reason. Even a truly terrible excuse for celluloid featuring a half-dead Dean Cain dressed in a Don Johnson costume. Sure, I watch with a pillow handy to muffle my screams and the remote in my hand so I can change the channel during the really scary stuff. But I just have to know that some of the characters make it out alive with brain stems intact. Particularly the brainy girl in glasses who managed to avoid illicit sex and drugs throughout the film because I can identify with ... nevermind.
There is hope. Authors like Mark Henry with his debut novel HAPPY HOUR OF THE DAMNED and Max Brooks' Zombie War series are bringing a lighter, even sexy side, to zombiedom. Maybe in a few years, I will be able to embrace zombies as cuddly corpses in need of understanding.
But probably not.
Monday, October 27, 2008
It has begun!
Bitten By Books' annual Bloggy Carnival begins today! Below you will find a link to fabulous prizes that could be yours - Gift cards, goodie bags, bath products, autographed books, e-books and gadgets!
I am contributing an autographed copy of NICE GIRLS DON'T HAVE FANGS, plus a Borders Gift Card from yours truly. You have to enter if you want to win, people. So check out the site for contest rules and how to play!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Included in this cornucopia of spooky fun is an autographed copy of NICE GIRLS, plus a $25 Borders Gift Card from yours truly. So even if you can't stand me, at least you get the gift card!
Keep checking back on the site. The list will mutate and grow as the Halloween countdown continues and more authors and companies are lured into Webmistress Rachel's... well, her web.
Details on the contests and how to win will be posted on Monday October 27th at 8:00 am!
Until then, visit Bitten by Books and post to Rachel, telling her what your favorite items would be to win. Oh, and invite your friends! The more people involved, the more fun it will be!
Saturday, October 11, 2008
My editor sent my book to several authors for cover blurbs and all of them had such nice things to say! It's very weird to know people have read the book and liked it.
Here's what they had to say
"I laughed from page one. Guffaws, people, not polite chuckles. Charming, sexy and hilarious, Nice Girls Don't Have Fangs made me laugh until I cried. Molly Harper knows how to sling a punch line. Her novel is witty and un-put-downable."
- Michele Bardsley, author of I'M THE VAMPIRE, THAT'S WHY and DON'T TALK BACK TO YOUR VAMPIRE.
"Molly Harper has a winner. Wicked fun that had me laughing out loud. Oh, and super hot guys! What's not to love? I read it all in one delicious sitting!"
- Candace Havens, author of THE DEMON KING AND I and CHARMED AND DANGEROUS.
"Wry, delicious fun! Move over Sookie Stackhouse--there's a new kid in town."
- Susan Andersen, author of CUTTING LOOSE.
Monday, October 6, 2008
The first time I told her, she wasn't terribly impressed, because after all, she writes her own songs. Songs with two lines that go on and on and on ... and on.
The second through twentieth time I explained about the books, I could tell she still wasn't buying it. I finally asked her why, she shrugged and said she hadn't seen the books at the store. So basically, she thinks her mommy is a compulsive liar.
Finally, the publisher sent me the mock-up for my first book cover. (You probably heard my girlish squeals if you live anywhere in the continental US.) I showed it to the tiny skeptic. We spelled out my name together and she said, "OK. I believe you."
I'm so glad I didn't go with a pen name.
So now, she thinks Mommy is the author of all books. Every time we go to the bookstore, she asks, "How many of these books did you write?" I have to say none, as my first book doesn't come out until March 2009. She goes through our book shelf and asks, "Did you write this one? Did you write this one? What about this one?"
Is it wrong that she asked if I wrote Harry Potter, I wanted to say, "Yes, yes, I did."
But that's the kind of claim that get you beat up at preschool.