Today we're hosting a little holiday trauma session and giveaway with absolutely fantastic Jane Porter.
I was lucky enough to be seated next to Jane at the Kentucky Book Fair, and having spent most of the day people-watching and sharing ridiculous stories from our lives, I can honestly say I want to be her when I grow up.
Jane's sharing her favorite holiday disaster story with us today, while my "Saga of the Exploding Stuffing" is posted at Jane's site. See details below on how to enter to win a copy of Jane's "Flirting With Forty." You may remember it was recently made into a Lifetime movie with Heather Locklear.
So here's Jane's tale of holiday woe:
My personal best Christmas disaster incident happened shortly after I became a single mom and went shopping for a Christmas tree with my boys. In fact it made such an impact on me, I actually wrote the scene into my novel, Flirting With Forty. Here’s an excerpt to share the scene… My main character Jacquie has just arrived home with her kids and they’re trying to maneuver the Christmas tree from the car into the house to set it up….
“Okay, William, Jessica, stand back,” I hang on to the SUV’s roof rack. “I’m going to drag the tree to the edge and then drop it down.”
I scoot the tree across the roof, cringing as the branches squeak and scratch.
Even though this isn’t a double trunk tree this year, it’s still heavy, heavier than expected and suddenly its caught on one of the rack rails. I tug, the tree doesn’t budge, I check the twine, it’s cut, check the tree, the branches aren’t caught. The tree is just too heavy to knock off the roof.
“William, I’m going to need a hand. Be careful.”
He’s eager to help. Jumps up on the driver’s seat, reaches for the top part of the tree.
I grunt as fresh noble fir branches slap my face. Another good hard yank and I should have tree off….
I put on a CD of Nat King Cole’s Christmas carols, do a little stretching, okay—feeling vaguely like Owen Wilson in Shanghai Noon—but that’s fine. Anything to keep this fun.
Jess, William and I fling open all the doors, grab a piece of tree and drag-carry our increasingly less noble, Noble Fir into the living room.
We get it there and it lies in the middle of the floor hogging space.
I stand back, rub sap off my hands. It’s a healthy big wide tree.
Still rubbing my hands I share the plan: “We’re going to slide the tree into the stand while it’s still on the ground. And then together we’ll lift it. Then while you guys hold it steady, I’ll tighten the screws and we can start decorating.”
It’s a good plan. It should work.
It doesn’t.
The tree’s lower branches won’t let us get the tree stand ring high enough around the trunk to hold the tree upright in the stand. We lower the tree down, screws are loosened with great difficulty (I shouldn’t have been so zealous with the pliers until I knew the tree would fit.)
We’re going to have to cut branches. And of course I don’t have any tools for cutting branches.
In the divorce Daniel get the second house, the Porsche, the new young girlfriend and the old saw we used for things like this.
I should have bought a saw.
“How about scissors?” Jessica suggests.
“Scissors will break,” I answer, sitting on my heels, hearing Nat croon but it’s not helping.
“How about a knife?” William offers.
“Sure.” I’m battling here for warmth and charm.
“Get the bread knife, though. That’s the long one with the serrated edge—“ I see his blank look, break off. “Never mind. I’ll get it.”
One bread knife later, I’m sawing at the slim lower branches that seem to have sprung up all over the tree base. It takes minutes to cut just one. There are at least ten more. My God. This could go on all night….
I’m still sawing away, swearing beneath my breath. I take a rest.
“Mom, let me do it. I can do it. I’m strong.”
“I don’t want you hurt.”
“I won’t get hurt.” He takes the knife from me. “Stand back.”
Stand back. I almost cry. Little boys shouldn’t have to ever take care of their mothers. “You can try, just for a minute,” I say, crouching close by in case he slices off a couple fingers and I have to run fast to get them on ice.
Nothing will go wrong, I tell myself. Why would anything go wrong? This whole tree thing has been a roaring success.
William saws and hacks away at the tree. Carpenters and contractors on home improvement shows would be appalled at our craft skills, but we’re a family, and we hack and saw like a family. “How’s it going?” I ask him.
“Good, Mom.”
Jessica’s crouching close now, too. “My turn.”
“No, Jessica. You’re not going to use the knife.”
“Why not? William is.”
“William’s almost four years older.”
“So?”
“Knives are dangerous—“
“You let him do everything and you don’t let me do anything.”
“You’re right.” I sit back, hands on thighs. “I should have let you get crushed by the tree instead of William. He’s ninety pounds and you’re what? Forty? You can handle it.”
She rolls her eyes at me. “I wouldn’t get crushed. That’s an exaggeration…”
“William, that’s good,” I say, beginning to get uneasy the longer he saws at the tree. I’m just waiting for the knife to slip, fingers to fly, blood spurting. And I’m seriously not good with blood.
Twenty minutes later we’re ready to try to stand the tree again. William and I are holding the tree and trying to shake it all the way down to the bottom of the stand and we can’t get it down no matter how hard we try.
I stand back to see what it looks like while William is buried in the tree, holding it steady. “Maybe it’s okay like this,” he mumbles around a mouthful of pine.
I’m thinking he’s right. It looks straight. Enough.
“Keep holding the tree, and I’ll tighten the screws the rest of the way.” I’ve located a second pair of pliers and with pliers in hand I wiggle on my stomach beneath the tree, heading in face first as if I’m auditioning for the staged version of Desert Storm. Jessica’s crawling in from the other side with her pliers and together we bang and clank on the screws while William shouts encouragements.
“You’ve got it,” he says. “Looks great. I think it’s going to work.”
“Mom, I’ve got this side,” Jessica says.
And finally, sappy and red-faced, I crawl back out. The tree looks okay.
“Are we going to decorate now?” Jess asks, putting the pliers now to bookends, and drawer knobs and anything that protrudes….
Three hours later, the kids are finally in bed and I’m just finishing washing my face when I hear a horrible splintering crash from downstairs. I go cold everywhere and for a second can’t move. I just stand there with a sick icy feeling in my middle and I can see myself in the mirror, puffy shower cap still on my head, traces of foamy soap suds at the hairline, and I know what it is, that thud punctuated by breaking glass.
The tree.
It’s just gone down.
I just got up to check my tree stand after reading that.
OK, my lovlies, I’m giving away two copies of Jane's Flirting with Forty, and Jane's got prizes and Christmas goodies, too! All you’ve got to do is read Jane's story here, and then visit her blog here to read my story, then share your personal christmas disaster story with us on both blogs to enter the giveaway.
You don't have to share your story on both, but if you do, you double your chances for winning! And remember, no story is too weird. You can't spell "dysfunctional" without "F-U-N."
32 comments:
If Molly writes her books like she described the disaster they will be hilariously wonderful.
My nightmare Christmas was when one step-son and my nephew and the step-daughter and her bf came to our place. I was up at 5:30 a.m. to put the turkey in the oven. Had everything else done. At meal time, rushed a bit because step-son and nephew were in a bit of a hurry to get back to the city(girls I suspect) and step-daughter and guy friend had to drive back 2 1/4 hrs. Nice looking table and after the meal there sat a lot of the food. I’m thinking my cooking isn’t that bad. Dh and I had been married 6 years and the boys had been with us 1 yr.(oldest) and 2 years( youngest who was there) and the daughter had never lived with us as she was at her grandparents. Their Mom had passed away 7 years earlier. What I’m trying to say is they hadn’t eaten much of my cooking to get used to my style. Everyone had turkey, mashed potatoes and very little veggies(even though they ate peas/carrots/corn but no to mashed turnips. I found out that their family didn’t do veggies and salads once I got married. There sat my home-made buns(one each at the most), my fruit salad, the cranberries, the Ginger Ale/Cranberry juice in the glasses. They were basic eaters. I was devastated. Not many liked the drink, the jelly salad was foreign to them and they ‘no like’ veggies which I knew but…. Next the gift opening. Things were fine until the step daughter’s boyfriend starts opening his; he says here Rhonda and hands her the white tube socks we gave him(apparently he only wore grey ones); this went on with 2 or 3 gifties and didn’t make me feel great by any means. How childish is my thought.
Merry Christmas everyone!
OH gosh Christmas disaster, who does not have one this season.
I was at the store today in fact and brought my list in hand. I shopped with my 3 yr old and felt pretty pleased since I was getting things done in time before I went to go pick up my school aged kids. I paid for the items and got out to the car. I left town and when I got to the next I stopped to get gas and found NO PURSE. I scrambled looking through the car and went 10 miles back to the store and asked inside. NO PURSE. I wandered around where I parked the car and saw the basket we used with the purse clipped into the back of the child seat area with the waist strap. My 3yr strapped it in behind the shelf area. I was lucky no one picked it up. I was also lucky to get home just as my kids were getting out of school. I may have left a few nerves behind, and I skipped getting gas. SO yes already I am having holiday mishaps.
Happy Holidays to you wonderful ladies.
Sounds like something I'd do!
I don't have any Christmas disaster stories, really. Sure, the occasional Christmas tree falling over and scorched turkey. Alas, no fights or drunken brawls.
My uncle did give my grandmother a Christmas card once with a picture of her sitting on the toilet wearing a chef's hat. Yeah, the good ol' days.
I love Jacquie's (errr Jane's) story! I also love that book and movie...I also love Robert Buckley (even though you didn't ask!).
My biggest holiday disaster is one that left me quite sore for a while. It's tough to re-visit, but for the sake of this fun contest I will; fortunately it's short and bitter (err, I mean sweet).
My worst holiday disaster was Christmas 2002 (I think that was the year). My mom is prone to being tardy (ok, really late) but this year it was the worst EVER. My Christmas gathering (my husband's and my family) all were to be at my house between 3-3:30 p.m. for gifts, dinner and merriment. My mom arrived at 7:30 p.m....yes that's right, she walked up as people were LEAVING!!! I was in tears, everyone felt awkward and embarrassed for me, and we didn't speak for nearly a month. To be entirely honest, it took me more than a year to forgive her (shame on me), but it was pretty awful. She never said she was sorry and when I told her how mad I was (and why), she said "sorry you feel that way". I'm happy to say all is mended and healed, but it was nothing BUT a disaster as far as I am concerned.
Merry Christmas!
Shannon in Tustin
Okay! One of Jane's posts reminded me of a cooking disaster when I was growing up.
My mom used to store man-size kleenexes in our oven (don't ask me why) and (you guessed it) she burned them all up when she preheated the oven for the turkey. Man did it stink up the house!
One year there was one present left under the tree. When I went to go retrieve said present the entire tree came crashing down on top of me. Ornaments broke. The window got scratched. And I was in a lot of pain. Not fun at all.
Hm...probably the biggest Christmas disaster is the year I ruined my boyfriend's Christmas gift. We were spending the holiday vacation with his family, and he had gotten his baby sister this beautiful scarf online. The postman delivered it in the mail Christmas eve...and I just happened to be the one who took the package. I exclaimed, "I didn't know USPS delivered during the break!" and his sister ran to me, eager. We both didn't know it was her present because it was supposed to be a surprise. Ummm oops.
Stephanie
thestephanieloves AT gmail DOT com
I've read Flirting with Forty and seen the movie. It is fabulous. Jane is a great writer and really knows how to connect with her readers.
Baking isn't my forte so I thought that a cake that I had baked was ready but it was raw inside and there was no dessert.
I have to admit that the opening scene in Flirting with Forty really hooked me! Jane could have written it just for me. I can remember the same thing, buying a Christmas tree while my husband was deployed and I was six months pregnant and had a toddler. Not only did I have to pick it out with my toddler running amuck and my ample body not able to keep up, I had to roll it off the roof of my car once we were home and up the back deck steps (a full flight) and into the house and we were prone to ice in NC. It was never quite straight but didn't fall over. Whew! This year my husband is overseas again but my kids are much older and more helpful. They can help me carry it in and actually tell me if it's straight as I tighten it in the stand.
Merry Christmas all!
My disaster just happened last year when I was setting up my tree. I always put a four foot tree on a table in front of the window.I always pull the table out decorate the tree then push it back in front of the window, been doing this for years but last year after spending hour decorating the tree I went to put the table back and knock over the tree. I broke about half of my blown glass ornament and I was heart broken, felt like crying. This year I decorated the tree with it in front of the window so I wouldn't have to move that table. So I have been there with the tree turning over.
i was fortunate to meet you and jane at the kentucky book fair…you both are wonderful! the only disaster i can remember was when i accidentally fell into the tree when i tripped and it broke the base of our artificial tree. i had to duct tape it so we could keep it together and then put boxes around the base to give it a little more support. it leaned a little but it worked well enough to get us through the holiday! lol
hope your holidays are bright and merry!
I shared a fun story on Jane's blog so I'll share a not so fun story here. When my daughters were young we usually bought a live tree for Christmas because they loved live trees, me not so much. Anyway we got the tree decorated and it looked beautiful. Well a couple of days after we put it up the girls were at school and I was at work, we came home and found that our cat had climbed up the tree and batted off at least half the Christmas balls off in the floor and broke them. He did a number on the garland too. Then to add insult to injury he tried eating the garland and yacked it up all over the floor. So not only did I have to clean up the broken ornaments but cat puke too. Yuck!! After that we closed him up during the day where he couldn't get to the tree.
Hi, Molly! I loved your stuffing story! I had a similar incident with a beautiful, fully-loaded glass baking dish of lasagna. It was truly psychedelic! When I was a kid in the 60s, I had a tie-dyed t-shirt that looked just like the splatter pattern that lasagna made in my kitchen : )
“Pride Goeth Before a Pie”
I have always loved to cook, and I began preparing the meals for my family when I was just ten years old. By that time, my grandmother was no longer able to grocery shop and cook our meals. She taught me how to cook, and we managed pretty good. My mom and grandfather worked full-time and I went to school. We each did what we could to keep it all together. My grandfather’s favorite pie was mincemeat, and I decided to make him a pie one Christmas. It was a beautiful mincemeat pie with a golden, fluted-edge crust. I wanted to be just like my grandmother, so I sat my pie on a chair on the back porch so that it would cool quicker. My grandfather could hardly wait for a taste of that pie. It was a wonderfully clear and cold December day with a bright blue sky. Not a cloud in sight. A great day for birds! When I went back to get my prize-worthy pie, birds had completely pecked away the carefully fluted edge of the pie crust. They left a perfect ring of crumbs around the pie pan. I was devastated! My grandfather loved to tease me, and he told me that since there were no dead birds in sight, the pie was probably safe to eat! I cried, but he gave me a hug and took over that pie. He brushed off the top and cut away a narrow ring around the edge. Over the next few days, he managed to consume the whole pie. No one else would touch it! He told me many times that it was the best mincemeat pie he ever ate. It was the only one I ever made : (
I had been married 30 years and yet a few years ago I was given a coffee gift set from the family who drew my name at the in-laws holiday get together. I was very puzzled because I don't drink coffee - never have, never will. Every meal I had ever eaten with his family for all the years of marriage I declined coffee, so I was stunned to open this present with my name on it. Of course someone blurted out, "but Kathy doesn't drink coffee" and I replied, as my mom had taught me always to be polite, "it will be nice for guests" and set it aside. My brother-in-law was a teacher and I think he re-gifted me with something he had received. I had hurt feelings because the present was completely thoughtless and cheap!
The very next year the same family drew my name and I opened a present of a cut glass bowl that looked just like one we had received oh so many years ago as a wedding present, and I reacted too quickly and said, "it looks like a wedding present" and I must have hit the nail on the head because I saw significant glances going across the room. You see, that family had just moved to a condo and had obviously "re-gifted" a 30+ year old present that they didn't use or want anymore.
After two embarrassing disasters in a row, I guess they finally gave up on even bothering to give me a present, because the gift exchange now is we all bring one present suitable for anyone (no drawing names) and we do the "open or steal game" and it works out much better for all.
I'm a huge Jane Porter fan. If you're a friend of hers, you must be alright. :) I would love to read, And One Last Thing.
My story wasn't exactly a disaster, but it was a lesson learned. I had never cooked a turkey. Silly me, thought would be easier to cook it in the crockpot. It was dry as dirt. My dad kept asking for extra gravy! The lesson I learned was never try to take the easy way out in life. :) Merry Christmas!
I shared these on Jane's blog but added more. :)
Let's see..the time our dog, Hershey, peed on our tree? And we had to take everything off and get another tree, using a baby gate around the tree that year to avoid future incidents.
Or the many times our tree has crashed by children, animals or just because we were too complacent?
Potato soup because the potatoes cooked too long for mashed potatoes...
OR...the time I decided to make this fantastic ham recipe and forgot to take the netting off the ham? Yeah, so there we were trying to pull out as many pieces of the net so we could salvage enough meat for dinner. :)
As far as family things go my mom is famous for regifting BACK to us. I have no problems with regifting at all but the number one rule is NOT back to the person who gave it to you. It used to make me really angry to get things from Mom that I had given her but now it is just a realization that she just doesn't think. You understand the flaws of the people you love and learn to live with them.
LOVE Jane’s story! No big disasters except when baking. Had the kitchen table covered with dozens of cookies cooling, went down the basement to do the dryer, new load in washer thingie, and came upstairs to find our cat on the table licking all the tops of the cookies…
I loved that part of that book! It's so human, so...real.
My funny story would be the last Christmas I was able to spend with my parents before we moved east. Mom and Dad, for the first time in probably 15 years, decided to go out and get a real Christmas tree instead of putting up their artificial one. I'm not sure where they got this tree but I think it might have been from some sort of arachnid farm because it was FULL of spiders. Nothing harmful, just those little black jumping ones that kind of freak you out when you get too close, they jump at you. So the ceilling above the tree was black with spiders when we woke up Christmas morning and the presents had spiders on them. We were all kind of spooked every time someone reached for a gift. It took forever to get all those bugs out of the house and the next Christmas had Mom and Dad pulling out the artificial tree once more :D
Flirting with 40 was on TV one day last week but it was late and i was going to bed so i only watched a little bit but the scene with the Christmas tree is the one i watched just before goint to bed. lol It's one of those moments as a mom you want to pull your hair out. It's probably funny for Jane now to look back on it.
The only horror story i can think of right at this minute was when my mom burned the rolls a few yrs ago and hurry up and ran them out of the house and got rid of them before my dad could see because she knew he just HAVE to say something about it. lol She made more and no one who saw her run out with them never said a word to my dad.
The one other thing i just remembered was when my older brother ( by 18 months) convinced my younger sister and i that it was Christmas day and we should open all out gifts. Our parents were milking cow ( lived on a daity farm) and we were in the house by ourselves and so we opened EVERYHTHING then my brother realizes ( yeah right) that it's not really Christmas and we need re wrap everything before mom comes in. Needless to say we wrapped everything but not well and we ran out of paper so some gift had nothing on the backside of it. lol He got a pr of PJ's but turns out mom got mixed up and he got a gown like for a girl instead of top and bottom for boys. Funny thing is he put it on too. I can't remember what kind of punshment we got for that. I know i was scared to death when she finally came in from the barn. lol
Lisa B
Well, I don’t have a funny Christmas disaster story. I do have a Christmas disaster that sits heavy on my heart every year. My step Grandma traveled out of state 4 years ago to visit her daughter for Christmas. She was amazing with my kids, went to every sporting event and birthday party and always tried to get my shy older son to open up to her. I didn’t always get along with her when I was younger, but once I grew up and had kids we became closer. I had two boys and became pregnant with my third and was excited it was a little girl. She was due on Jan. 3rd. My step grandma left for Christmas and I got a phone call from my step dad on Christmas eve that she ended up having a severe stroke and wasn’t going to make it. She was out of state so I had to say my goodbye to her on the phone. It was one of the hardest things I had to do. She ended up dying on Christmas morning which was also her birthday. We had heavy hearts that day and couldn’t get into the spirit as the kids opened their presents. Her funeral was to be two day’s later and my doctors didn’t wan’t me traveling because I was already dialating and almost ready to have my daughter. I went into the hospital and basically forced the doctors to induce me so I could go to her funeral. My daughter was born on the 27th and in tribute to my step grandma I gave her my step gandma’s middle name. She new how much I wanted a girl and was just as excited to meet her as I was to have her. I regret every day she never got a chance to see her, but I can’t wait till my daughter is older so I can tell her all about her middle name and the grandma she never got to meet. Sorry about the tear jerker, but I’ve always had stress free, no incident holidays and this is always the one that stands out to me and was a big disaster for our whole family. That was 4 years ago, now we all make sure to tell everyone we care everyday, especially on the holiday's. Christmas now has a new meaning as every year we look back to the one person we are missing during present opening and big dinners. Thanks for the chance to share, feels good to talk about it
I enjoyed both your stories and, although I have never had exploding stuffing, thank goodness, I have experienced falling trees both when I was young and when I had a family of my own. Both times animals were responsible and it was a huge mess.
While cooking Thanksgiving dinner several years ago at my Aunt’s house- everyone had had a bit too much wine. Being the pregnant one- I took over kitchen duties. I didn’t know that the double wall oven hadn’t been attached properly (a hint would have helped…) When I opened the oven to check on the turkey, the weight of having the turkey pulled out to basted- caused the oven to tip out of the wall and the turkey went sailing across the tile floor about 20 feet! Thank goodness it didn’t spill, so we were able to salvage it- but years later we still talk about the flying turkey!
One year after getting our Christmas tree at the tree farm, after my dad worked really hard to get it into the tree stand, he was carrying it into the living room when my mom said, "Larry, what's that noise?" My dad, true to from, said, "I don't hear anything." and kept on going. I had heard it too. It was a loud bzzzz bzzzz and we looked inside the branches and discovered a HUGE grapefruit sized wasps nest! I have never seen my dad move so fast. Once he got it out he proceeded to whack the nest with a stick until he knocked it out of the tree. Fortunately for all of us, it was really cold and the wasps were very slow moving. We then stomped on the ones that had fallen out of the nest when my dad knocked it out of the tree. From that year on, we ALL checked the tree from top to bottom for critters and shook it really hard and listened for any bzzzzing!
Hi Jane! Too fun that you gals are sharing your stories on each other's blog!! LOVE IT. Don't enter me in the contest, I already have a few copies:) and the movie:) BUT I can relate. I remember the first Christmas I was a single mom and YES, I did have to keep up the traditional Christmas tree search. Needless to say. . .I had to swallow my pride and get my neighbor to help us bring it in AND put it in the stand.
Not so much to win (though I'll take it!!!) but because you'll love this story:
In college, Sheri (roommate) and I decided to drive to the nearby town to look at some Christmas decorations for our cute little apartment. We set out in my 4-door Tempo the week before Thanksgiving and made the 20 minute drive in search of a sale.
A sale we found!!
On 7' pre-cut Christmas trees.
I love this tree, Sheri! Let's get it!
Yeah! A real, live Christmas tree.
The only problem being ... I drive a 4-door Tempo. Eh, surely it'll be fine! We can just slide it through from one door and roll the window down. It'll be cold, but we'll be fine. We pay for the tree, ask for the stock boy to help us carry it out, and THEN we find out that 1) they don't bag the trees in those neat little sleeves, and 2) there are no returns.
20 minutes later we're still trying to jam the tree in the car every which way we can imagine. Through the door, the window, the trunk, whatever. And laughing so hard we're about to pee our pants. (Incidentally, the stock boy does NOT find this at all funny.)
A very large pick-up truck drives up behind our car. It is being driven by an elderly man and his wife. They are eating popcorn from a bag (the store sold it outside) and laughing so hard they have tears in their eyes. I kid you not.
Can we take your tree home for you?
Oh, thank you so much, but we live in Greenville. It's too far. You don't have to do that; we'll get it.
"Trust me, sweetheart. We've gotten our money's worth watching you. It's been completely worth the drive."
(so he did!)
The first time I met my future inlaws was when I visited them with my future hubby at Christmastime. I was extremely nervous and wanted to make a good impression. I had spent weeks making homemade gifts and goodies for them, had gone shopping for new clothes with my mom (I have no fasion sense whatsoever), and had done a lot of praying in hopes that they would like me. When we arrived at their house everything was going well & finally breathed a great sigh of relief. That evening as the family gathered in the basement to watch t.v., I was upstairs taking a probably too-long hot shower to wash away the stress of the day. A little while into my shower, I hear a big knock at the door. It was the love of my life yelling at me to turn the water off! I had left the shower liner outside of the tub and water was pouring down into the basement. I have never been more embarrassed in my life. What must they have thought of their future daughter-in-law - that she didn't have enough common sense to put the shower liner inside the tub? Anyway, they inlaws couldn't have been more gracious about it & even tease me about it now. Whenever I get ready to go in the bathroom, one of them will yell, "Don't forget to put the shower liner inside the tub!"
My most memorable disaster story of Christmas(thankfully there have not been many) was back on Christmas 1997 when my now ex husband walked out on his 3 young daughters and myself. He left with a friend mid morning and said he would be back, but ended up going out of state and AWOL basically. We are much better off without him for many reasons...but to leave your children like that is just unforgivable. I had to deal with all their tears etc...not a fun Christmas at all. Happy Holidays to all.
Ha! this makes my story seem sort of mild, but here goes: I'm trying to have a 'happy Christmas' with a new soon-to-be husband and my dad (yeah, right!). There's a blizzard on Christmas eve, but dad still has to go into work. We've spent the night at his place so my stepmom and I can cook dinner - dad's favorite part of any holiday. Just as we're about to get started, I turn on the faucet...no water. The pipes are frozen. Trying to make lemonade out of lemons, we grab all the food, all the presents, and drive into town to my TINY little apartment and start from scratch to 'make Christmas'. Three of us in a kitchen built for one....a 16-lb. turkey (2 hours too late) in an oven built for warming leftovers...dinner was hours late, dad was furious that we 'abandoned' the house with frozen pipes - all in all, one of the worst Christmases I've ever spent with him (and that's saying something!)
It was the Christmas right after my husband and I divorced. First Holiday that I was living in another state, but was able to come up and share the festivities with my family. When my kids arrived with their dad, all was good, but then he stayed. I thought that was very wrong for my family to elect to have my ex stay to celebrate my families holidays with my kids after being seperated from them for months. I did the right thing, didnt tell anyone and kept it all to myself. But my family is my family and after a divorce, the ex shouldn't be allowed to share in holiday traditions. Its been a long time now and the past is the past and I am making new traditions with my youngest daughter. The other kids are all grown now and I dont get to see them as often as I wish, but someday, we will all share in a family celebration again.....the whole family! Happy Holidays everyone!
In the immortals words of "Fancy Nancy's" Grandpa "When life gives you cracked eggs, make eggnog."
I cannot recall any crazy, unusual disasters like so many of you have shared -- but one Christmas (just a couple years ago) I had to work so I wrote detailed instructions for my husband to cook the prime rib -- one of those can't go wrong recipes.You would have to know my husband -- he cannot even boil water. I walk into the house after work to find the table set with candles lit, my three sons all helping with the dinner -- and much to my amazement -- the prime rib turned out perfect!
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